Guilty of using the Guilt


I did wrote a blog on my procrastinated lazy life few days back named "Maybe Tomorrow". This post is about the climax of my lazy days. Especially I wish to describe the motivation behind getting back to my life - Guilt.

I was declared guilty of being a lazy person and not doing what was expected out of me by me. I could have lived with the guilt and remained the same, but guilt is not a good feeling and it increases exponentially with time.

Guilt of not utilizing the opportunity I have got, guilt of not giving my 100 percent, guilt of not respecting the work any body does, guilt of wasting time, guilt of living a life I don't like, guilt of failing without trying, guilt of giving up, and many more, a guilty mind doesn't stop, it increases and this was the emotion because of which I am able to live a life I want and enjoy every bit of it.

I code the project I am assigned, I read about the research topic I am interested in, I devote some time to prepare for my coming placement interviews, I read the book I love, I even read articles but now I am able to stop when I want and also accomplish some of my pending projects.

 

Sound of the world guilt brings negative thoughts in mind, but today I learned to use the negative side of an emotion for a positive cause.

I am Guilty of using Guilt to motivate myself and bring me back to life. Maybe you could use your guilt in a similar way. Do comment with your story of guilt :)

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Maybe Tomorrow

Image
This blog is about a strange phenomena which has taken over my life and I have not been able to get out of it. It is something which I have never felt before, it is something which scares the hell out of me, it is something which I haven't been able to find a solution to for a long time, it is something which I don't know. Let me first give you some context to my life. I have been a hard worker and have achieved all things with perseverance, have got no exceptional talents or gifts, so it's the only thing which I do and this make my life worth living. Working hard gives me satisfaction; which gives me happiness and in turn gives me realization that I did something worth doing. Working hard and doing something not useful doesn't matter to me, but not working hard and getting results does make me less happier. The best feeling is when I get rewards after I have worked hard for it. It doesn't happen that often but it does and that's what I live for. You can
Read more

Silence

Image
This post is about the silence which you feel when you don't get the very thing you always wanted, it is about the silence which prevails when you get rejected by the event you really worked hard for, it is about the pain you feel when you can't prove your self, it is about the tears you get when you don't even get what you least expected, it is about the time when you can't trust yourself, it is about the journey you think was coming to an end and it leaves you to the very spot where you started, it is about the thought when you think life is not worth living, it is about the loneliness you fell even though you have all your loved ones with you, it is about the silence which prevails in your mind thereafter......... We normal folks don't expect a lot from our lives, but we expect some small things and we even work hard to get them, to turn them into reality. We train ourselves for the worst, but still it's actually quite different when the silence arrives
Read more

It took me a while but I got there

It is tough to speak truth all the time. I try too, but I end up lying more often than I desire. Truth is more about fuckups and less about morals, I often resist speaking about the whole truth just because I don’t think the other person will understand my situation or the reason why I acted the way I did and will wrongly judge me or other fears which my mind spawns up for me. I believed that I am indifferent to the judgement — people have about me, but as it turns out, when I am placed in an unknown place full of strangers, those fears come out and haunt me. The truth simply put would be like, I thought these traits didn’t existed, I was immune from them, but they were there all along, they were just buried deep down and now they are alive again. I am happy they are back, as I can resolve them this time and not leave them unattended.  The happiness comes from this fear of living with the negative ailments in me.  Now, wouldn’t you agree with me, that it is difficult to explain t
Read more